30 Day Writing Challenge: DAY 8

Share something you struggle with

I see people reaching the peak of their lives at such a young age, while I find myself struggling to find the path to where I’m supposed to be.

I’m currently watching Project Runway: Threads, which is very timely and also like a very big jab to the gut seeing contestants as young as 10 sewing and creating their own clothes! I can barely stitch a straight line using a sewing machine! These kids are geniuses!

What I’m saying is, how did these kids realize what they’re supposed to do in life at that age when an adult like me is having a hard time figuring out my purpose in life? At 25, I’m supposed to have savings, a car or a house, or my whole life planned out. Well, to be fair, I’ve made plans my whole life, but that’s it, nothing seemed to have fallen into place, yet.

As I grow older, I become even more scared that it’s also getting too late for me to be still on the stage of figuring out a life that I’m supposed to have. I’m scared that the world has no more room for another human being with dreams of becoming another photographer or writer or an artist. I’m also scared that all these fears would soon eat and swallow me whole into an abyss where I couldn’t get out of. I’m just going to drown in misery and regret with no future and nothing to hold on to. I’m scared that I’m just existing, and not really living.

I’m struggling with all these fears in mind, but there are still times when I see a light at the end of this darkness, finding hope and positivity just when I need them the most.

I definitely have these guys to blame! Oh, what a messed up crew I have up there!

photo links back to owner

Kidding aside, I’m still wishing, dreaming and hoping that a few years from now, I’m gonna be reading this exact entry and think, “I’ve definitely come a long way since that unfortunate day!” 🙂

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