Closed Doors

Yesterday, I made a  stupid decision and let a few people down again, which in turn made me feel down too. Good thing, something came up that turned the whole thing upside down.

Friday night, I got horribly drunk (which was a first) with my office mates that I’ve only known for quite some time, but that’s a different story. Then I woke up at 5:30, and took a cab home, showered and made it to the 1st training day of outbound education. That night, we had to go through a diagnostic 10k run. I got home at 7:30ish and thought about what happened that day and slept. Woke up early to make breakfast, took a bath and just thought things through one more time before I decided not to go through 2nd day and I didn’t. I sent messages to my friend, her friend and one facilitator. It was nerve-wracking, but I did what I felt was right and just threw everything down the drain.

I know what I’ve done was ^%$$^%&^@$, You don’t have to rub it in! 😛

So much about that horrible, stupid move. Now on to the happy moments of our Sunday Fun day! I’m so happy, I could kiss an elephant’s butt!

So after going through depression for around 3 minutes and 28 seconds, I asked my sister the most brilliant question I have asked her in my 24 years of living, “So, where are you supposed to go today?” and the rest, as they all say is history!

A few hours later, we were crying and laughing at the same time listening to Bo Sanchez and Arun Gogna. It was one of the highlights of the day that I couldn’t help but share what I’ve learned immediately to friends on our way home.

Here’s what got me thinking since yesterday:

  • We forget to (or sometimes completely don’t) thank God for the closed doors in our lives.
  • We don’t embrace the No’s (rejections, trials, tribulations) as much when in fact these make our Yeses sweeter!
  • We give up  just when we’re so close to getting to our goal.
  • Arun’s question: If you know the number of no’s or rejections you’d get before you get to your Yes/Goal, would you give up on your first no? Won’t you anticipate the rest of your no’s just so you could get to your yes? (hope this makes sense)
  • We don’t see the No’s or closed doors in our lives as God’s way of protecting us.
  • There are 2 types of closed doors: those that are locked on the other side that only God can help us with or those that are locked on the same side we are on that only we can unlock.

Early this morning after I took a bath, my mother who just came back from a weekend trip shook me out of sleepiness by crying out how stupid I was for throwing hair into the toilet. Normally, I’d just ignore her and throw a mature tantrum by using silent treatment and ignoring her for days, but today I managed to see past through the hurt and sadness and kissed her on my way out of the car. 🙂

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continuation…..

I slept in the middle of writing this entry, so to continue, I’d like to share that I managed to start a small talk yesterday with the magbabalut I wrote a hefty instagram post for a while back. I felt really nice because he responded gleefully and I managed to even say “ingat po” when he pedaled away. 🙂 It’s really nice to talk to old people every once in a while especially when you get to make them smile, that’s why when we visit lola, I make sure I get to tease her endlessly because it feels good to make them feel good, even if it gets on their nerves sometimes. 😛

Anyway, here are some pictures of my Sundate with Kat 🙂

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13I’ve had a lot of closed doors in my life and never had I thought of thanking God for them too, at least not specifically. I just pray and thank God for helping me get through all that and for helping me learn from my mistakes but not really for the rejections and obstacles I’ve had in life.

So clearly, God opened a window when I felt that another opportunity closed its door for me (even if it was hugely my fault). 😛

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3 thoughts on “Closed Doors

  1. At least now you know for sure that being an Outbound Facilitator aint your thing, girl! 😀 And the “what ifs” of life won’t ever haunt you again. Don’t worry too much about letting people down, we can’t really please everyone. What’s important is YOU TRIED. That’s better than not trying at all, right?

    I love talking to old people too – bridging the gap between two generations. We learn a lot from them about understanding where our parents and grandparents are coming from, at the same time, they learn something from us with the new stuff in this world.

    I actually envy the closeness you and your sister have. It’s one of the main reasons why I, somehow, cling to my friends THAT much, because I don’t get to share the same interests I have with my sister the way I do with my friends 😦 #excusethedrama

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    • WOAAAHHH!!! 3 paragraphs! Welcome back bum life, at least for 3 days! and Yeah, at least I made it to training day 1! haha! I just don’t think I’m teacher material! 😛

      And to add to what you said, old people do want to talk a loooooooooot because they’ve lived so long and they’ve so much to tell. Unfortunately, only a few are interested to listen 😦

      Lastly, I think you and your ate are waaaay closer than Kat and I are. You guys get to talk about anything, while I have to censor a few things about my life when we talk. I guess we just like to try a lot of new things together? or we love shopping together? And we love making fun of each other, but that’s about it! LOL! 😛

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      • My three-paragraph reply proves i’m a bum AT THE MOMENT.

        I guess “close” is not the correct term. Maybe, I was looking for the kind of bond where in we could both have the same interests and likes. My sister and I have totally different hobbies and interests in life. We can’t seem to find anything in common. That’s possible. You can talk to someone about almost anything, yet don’t have anything in common with him/her.

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