New life

I’ve been meaning to get a job in the past few months and, lo and behold, here I am, a few months after, on my first day at my new job! And just like anything new that comes into your life, it always comes with this feeling of uncertainty, discomfort and fear. I’m not saying that this is not a breath of fresh air and a big blessing because it is, but the thing is, there’s still something missing.

I’m actually beginning to doubt my ability to stay long in one company. I’m even getting more scared that I’m turning into that girl stereotyped by my parents and most people their age as part of the younger generation who are never content, especially when it comes to work.

It’s just that people always make movies that make us believe in dreams and in living these dreams no matter how impossible they can be. Then they would further quote the lines from these movies stressing the fact that one should be idealistic instead of being realistic. How can you not dream big, right?

Going back to my new job, I feel that I’m even more out of place than ever. What am I thinking? I don’t even see people coming from prestigious schools anymore (not that people who came from other schools are not as special). But then again, I keep telling myself, this is just the start of getting back on track. I always think that to get to the top, you must learn to start at the bottom. So here I am, trying to earn money (ehem ehem at the bottom) just so I could chase the dream I’ve had in mind for a long time (without asking any more from my parents, not even my daily allowance).

I know most people (like my parents’ office mates and other relatives) find it odd that I now work here, but like what the CEO said  in his talk yesterday, I should be proud that I’m helping build better lives through education. It might not be the perfect choice at the moment, but it is just as rewarding as any job that renders service out there.

I just wish that the next job I get is really, really, really the one for me and that I may be able to achieve my goal for myself one day at a time. 🙂

TING POSITIVE! TING! TING! TING!

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my table earlier today 🙂 #firstdayhigh

B’s 15 questions!

Last week I had this crazy idea to interview my boyfriend, B out of the blue. I had been reading one too many lifestyle magazines on http://issuu.com/ that I wanted to come up with my own. What better way to start one than to feature a special person for an issue right? Seeing how these publications turn out, I feel giddy just thinking about how I can layout my own articles and photos too to create a really amateur magazine of my own. More on these magazines and my dream of making one on another post soon!

So there we were last night making fun of each other, though still stressing upon him that it needed to be a serious one. You see, I find B very talented and full of potential. I may not be the most supportive girlfriend in the world, but I really am proud of him and his incredibly attractive voice. La la la la! Though I know he chooses to pursue a degree in Mass Communication at the moment, that can’t take the fact that the dream of becoming a star still lives on within him. So I asked him a couple of questions for me and some of you to get to know him a bit more (though he was a little more mum than usual, which defeats the purpose of the interview).

1. What is your ultimate dream job?

  • I want to be a musician.

2. Why do you think dreams are important?

  • Dreams will determine one’s future.

3. How do you see yourself 5 years from now?

  • Singing in front of a large crowd.

4. Who do you look up to and why?

  • I look up to my mother because she is a strong and intelligent woman and I want to raise my future children the way she raised us.

5. What do you consider your life’s best lessons that you wish to impart to the younger ones?

  • Take risks because you only live once and never be afraid of failure.
  • Learn to accept things you cannot change.

6. What do you value most in life?

  • My friends, family and girlfriend

7. If you don’t get to be a singer, what other options do you have in mind?

  • Anything related to music like a music professor or a radio DJ

8. Can you think of a special memory that made you into the man you are today?

  • Nung mga bata kami, grade two ako noon, umuwi si papa na lasing. Nandun kami ni Ivan sa kwarto namin at takot na takot dahil kapag lasing si papa, nagiging barumbado siya. Kinausap niya kami tungkol sa naging buhay niya. Kinuwento niya lahat sa amin pati pagkamatay ng tatay niya and panganay nilang kapatid. Doon ko natutunan i-value yung mga taong nakapaligid sa akin at natutunan ko rin na hindi porket lalaki ka, hindi mo na pwede ipakita yung soft side mo, yung vulnerable side mo. 

9. If you have any, what do you regret the most?

  • Not being a good brother to my siblings and not being expressive enough.

10. And what are you most proud of?

  • I get to live my dream one day at a time.

11. Aside from singing, what other things are you good at?

  • I’m good at giving advice, cooking and making my ears move without using my hands.

12. Are there still things that you’d like to try?

  • I want to be an astronaut and go to space, be a pilot and fly because those would make me feel liberated.

13. 3 things on your personal bucket list:

  • Travel the world
  • Ride a space shuttle and go to the moon
  • Be on any US show like Ellen or on Late Night With Jimmy Fallon

14. Top 3 favorite songs:

  • With a Smile
  • Huling El Bimbo
  • Won’t Go Home Without You

15. Do you think that your life is now falling into place?

  • Yes because I’m much more content in my life. Dati masyado kang materialistic pero ngayon na-realize ko na meron pang ilang mas mahalaga bukod sa materyal na bagay.

I know, I know they’re not the golden, million dollar questions to ask to get featured on the best magazines or in Buzz ng Bayan, but hey, they sure did help us get something out of this boy who’s feigning his shyness here. Just kidding! I guess he isn’t really very keen on these types of conversations yet, especially with me being uncomfortably serious and demanding. Maybe I’ll do another one some other time when he gets famous or something and ask him forbidden questions as well! Abangan!

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One of my favorite photos that I took of him! 🙂

Compatibility

I got a chance to visit Bianca Gonzalez’ blog once again after so long and I’m glad she started blogging again! Then I saw this Bro Show season ender she and boyfriend, JC Intal were in and I thought that it was too funny not to repost. So here I am, an hour of laughing out loud (as in when watching-vice-ganda-videos-loud) after, posting it here as well.

I’m a huuuuge fan of Bianca ever since her starting up years in the entertainment industry. I can’t remember if I first discovered her in a magazine, in Y-speak or through her blog. What I know is that I hoarded all of the magazines she was in, watched PBB Celebrity edition where she was in as well, followed her blog ever since her college years and pretty much just watched all of the shows she was in. No this is not a fan girl I-wanna-be-like-her-someday kind of thing. It’s pretty much more than that after being her follower all these years. How I wish I could have the life she’s having, but now that I am slowly starting to figure out what I want, I thought, maybe I just admire her for who she is. I remember hating her for having those PDA moments with now actor, Zanjoe Marudo inside the PBB house when she has Direk Lino Cayetano waiting for her out in the real world. It wasn’t a great move for her, but now I realize that she’s just a person and though she’s someone I looked up to, there can never be a perfect person to ever walk this planet. Now that she’s become more mature and much more where she wants to be (I think), I still admire her because she’s made much more responsible choices (being an advocate of different organizations and all that) and she continues to inspire so many, including me!

Being a supermodel (fashion, tv ads, and role model) or so I’d like to think, is one thing that I like about her, but being in a really beautiful relationship with beau JC Intal is another thing! When I first heard about them, all I could think of was, “teka, they must have been friends back in college pa!” which got me soooo giddy, knowing that they both went to Ateneo, but after watching this Bro Show episode, I thought that it was actually cute that they didn’t even know each other personally back then.

I look up to both of them since they may be a power couple to most of us, but seeing them together for the first time in a show (we mostly only see them in photos) made it seem like they’re two kids who are madly in love with each other but are afraid to get caught doing PDA. Also, aside from Bianca, I also know JC as one of the best players of Ateneo back when I was in high school. (Yes, though I came from an all girls’ school, most of us were also fans of the ADMU-DLSU rivalry ever since then). So it just seems fitting for them to end up together, parang two of the most accomplished personalities who you idolize, who may seem confident in their own but different careers, but shy in real life, both good-looking and young…….you get what I mean. No, you don’t, but to cut to the chase, all I wanted to say is that they’re prefect for each other.

Gulo lang, pero what they are to most of  us is a perfect combination. Compatible! Aren’t they? So now, it got me thinking, how do you know if you’re compatible with the person you’re with right now? I know most of my posts are pretty much about love, though it’s March already and I should be posting fire prevention stuff, I wanted to know, how do you know?

I have a friend named Jannina and she blogs too (http://janninadaydreams.blogspot.com/), and if I’m not mistaken, just a few days ago, we were talking about knowing more about a someone’s personality through her sign (Zodiac or Chinese). She’s really good at this. So here I am getting the idea from it and checking my compatibility with my boyfriend, B. When we first started going out, I checked this astrology book I had for years and I was encouraged because he is a Capricorn and I’m a Scorpio and it said in the book that we were compatible. True enough, if you look it up somewhere else, they would say that it’s a good combination, not perfect though, but it’s got a potential. Now that we’re going through something, I remembered to check it again and lo and behold, it’s not something that I expected.

If you were to sign a pre-nup, Schedule A must clearly designate who will play the “Top” and who will be the “Bottom.” After your attorneys haggle over the prone position, you may just call off the engagement. An inability to reach settlement is likely for two uncompromising Alphas such as yourselves. Although your business-savvy signs can make quite the contemporary Napoleon and Josephine, LLC, there are terms that must be negotiated in advance. For one, you’ll need to swear off secrecy—and that will be the true test of your relationship. Scorpio and Capricorn are masters of underhanded power plays that could topple this merger fast. Your first job: learn and practice direct communication (“whip me like THIS” or “no, darling, the leather corset, not the PVC”). Master it, and the rest is a cakewalk. You can lash each other to bedposts, tryst on the conference table in your glass-paned office tower, or earn your mile-high wings with nary a flight attendant knowing. The 2.5 kids you produce will have some interesting conception stories, that’s for sure. Not that you’ll ever tell. A little secrecy with the rest of the world is fine. Just make sure to erase those sex tapes before the housekeeper finds them.

Read more: Scorpio and Capricorn Compatibility – Horoscope Love Compatibility – ELLE
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Okay, I’m not so sure about the whole prediction, but what struck me the most was the one I underlined. That’s exactly why we are currently having this major fight! No one wants to compromise. Well, I do, but it’s not consistent and we both have our own beliefs that would just not coincide!

Here’s another reading, but this time based on the Chinese Zodiac…

The compatibility rating for Brianne and Marielle is 70% (Well Suited)

You are a couple that craves for romance, but have to face the truth. Both of you are perfectionists and like to pursue a lofty goal. The marriage makes you restrain your idealization and learn to walk abreast and treat each other with your true heart. The male sheep is very frank and easily affected by the surroundings. While the female snake is calculating, strong-minded and resolute. You may have complaints on the other because of high expections.

ImageSo I highlighted the ones that I agree with and find true. For B, I don’t exactly know what having and iron hand in a velvet glove mean, but thanks to the free dictionary, I learned that it means: something that you say when you are describing someone who seems to be gentle but is in fact severe and firm! That’s kinda sexy! HAHA! Kidding aside, it may seem true at times. I also love how he described a sheep as pessimistic, moody and sentimental! That is soooooo like him, although he started working on being optimistic as part of his resolution this year. Also, I agree that he looks charming and gets so much attention from girls, but how could the Chinese zodiac tell that? It also says that a sheep will work hard for those they love, this pretty much I agree with and I can see it! Lastly, his lucky direction?——syempre towards me in the EAST! 🙂

As for my reading, I was struck by the statement that I am rational but can lose myself once I fall in love. This can be applicable to most if not all, but maybe this is the reason for my falling head over heels for him. Cheeseballs! On the other hand, I could not agree with the fact that my weakness is communication. You could say that, for all I care, but I’m sure that if there’s one thing I learned from our relationship is that we’ve fixed a lot of our problems through good communication. Although when I think about it, maybe I’m really not good in handling fights and all.

Oh well, I’d like to say that everything we read or everything that these signs say are all right and we should depend on them every time, but we shouldn’t. Some of them are true, but the rest is still up to us. We cannot always rely on these things but they can help us, probably guide us in the way we interact and communicate with others, just as Jan said.

Compatibility isn’t figured out through first dates (although it can help if you click on the first day), but through your willingness to make yourself perfect for the person you’re with. You adjust to your partner’s personality and that’s how you see way past compatibility… That’s how you see that you are truly the missing piece of the puzzle that is his/her heart.

Wicker Park!

Back in high school, I bought this 10-movies-(or more)-in-one dvd for P50. It has “The Notebook“, “Serendipity” and “A Lot Like Love“, all of which I have seen more than you can imagine! It was such a treasure that I would go nuts whenever it goes missing! If I were to define how “gasgas” this dvd and these movies are to me, I would literally say that even the dvd is scarred with scratch marks from too much playing. That’s how “gasgas” it is already, but to tell you honestly, I can die today telling you (without taking it back) how much these movies have become my all time favorites, my inspiration and the dream love stories I wanted for myself all these years. These are old school movies that have similarly moved me in different ways. I’m a sucker for happy endings which is why although the characters in these movies took years to figure out that they were all destined for each other, they still ended up with each other…..for me. Charot!

You’re probably wondering where the rest of the movies at, right? Well, I had them removed since they’re either too sad, too old or too stuffy for me. You know how I am, if it’s not too chick-flicky (what the hell?) or if it doesn’t have Rachel McAdams in it or all the people I love, it’s not for me. HAHA! This girl is sooooo shallow, you might think. I’m sorry, but you know what I mean. Sometimes, I get to be in the mood for long and simple, indie-type love stories, sometimes I’m not. For today, I am back in my usual hopeless romantic, grand gesture-loving self and I’m here to tell you how amazing this wonderful story of Matt and Lisa is 🙂

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happy couple, Matt and Lisa

The rest of the movies are safe and still quite intact and well, unplayed. I’ll find time for those hopefully in the next, few years just as I have or haven’t even bothered watching this incredible movie, Wicker Park until yesterday. Yeah you heard it right. I have just seen it now, and only out of boredom, so it wasn’t like I was planning on seeing it. I am already 24 years old and like what I said, I’ve had this dvd ever since high school. So it took me about 8-9 years tops, before I gave it another chance. I have seen this before (a couple of times), but maybe I was too preoccupied or just not in the mood for something so serious so I couldn’t bring myself to finish it. I remember my friend, Marion (tweeted her yesterday to tell her the good news) trying to convince me a couple of times years ago to watch it, and when I did, I was boooooooooooored that I just couldn’t appreciate it. There were times that I would fall asleep and I’m not even halfway through it, so you could just imagine how painfully challenging it was for me to see it, until yesterday. I guess I was just too sad that I finally gave it ONE MORE CHANCE, and boy I’m glad I did!

One thing I liked about it is the soundtrack and the tiny bit of artsy film making they had going on. Plus, the plot was fantastic. In the end, I was on the edge of my seat, hands and feet cold and clasped together while muttering silently “please, please dalian mo taxi driver!”. Of course, I hated Rose Byrne’s character, Alex, but in the end, I realized, she was right….people can really do some serious, crazy stuff for love. Somehow, the ending made me hate her a little less especially when she explained her side of the story. Mid-film, I was just thinking, how could anyone be this cruel, trying so hard to keep two lovers apart? I mean, what do they get from it? Then seeing it from Alex’s perspective, I felt sorry for her. I was thinking that if that happened to me, I probably would’ve done the same thing!!!! GRRRRRR!!!! Of course, that was an exaggeration. I would’ve just moped hopelessly and listened to sad playlists all day long! Imagine, you saw the guy first and you were pouring your heart out telling everything to this friend and suddenly, you realize the boy falls in love with this friend of yours. Isn’t too………..kim-maja-ish? HAHAHAHHA! Affected pa rin? haha!

I still feel sorry for her, Alex, realizing how that sort of thing could happen or actually happens and even more often than we know! Chances are, your love or feelings for someone ignored or not reciprocated HAPPENS more than the other way around. It’s more common than getting a cough or cold in a polar-vortexy weather or getting sun-burned during summer despite slathering on your SPF2000 sunscreens. Unrequited love, who hasn’t experienced that? Unless of course you have the face and body of a barbie doll or walk around carrying gold bricks in your pockets. No offense meant, but isn’t it true? Everyone must have been through this may it be a simple infatuation that you’ve kept hidden or a feeling so strong you have literally done everything to tell that special someone how cherished he or she is to you.

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Alex

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The revelation

Love. Mutually given or returned is what we all homo-sapiens want. That’s what even our pets want! Who would want to be alone?! I’m sure Alex might have gone too far, drowned with obsession and unreciprocated feelings, but she’ll find someone who will fill that emptiness if she lets that someone do. We get hurt all the time, but if we open up our minds, and remove the blinders off our eyes, we can see a whole new world that we might not have appreciated because we’re too focused on one thing. I know I’m not in Alex’s shoes to be saying this right now, but I’ve been there and if I haven’t given this boy a chance, he wouldn’t have been mine and I wouldn’t have been this happy. Although we’re going through some very, very, very rough patches at the moment, I could tell that we could work it out and find my way back into his heart once more.

Earlier I said that I watched this because I was too heartbroken and I still am. I couldn’t understand him and his ways and his thinking, but I know I love him and to love is to sacrifice. Right now, I’m torn between our differences in thought. He has his own outlook in life and sometimes, I couldn’t really get myself to understand what he’s trying to point out, with conviction, might I say. All I know right now is that I need to do what he says, but I must also be true to myself. If thinking the way he thinks makes me lie to myself, does that make this right? I just hope that whatever we’re going through right now, makes us stronger as individuals and as a couple and helps us make our way back to each other. After all, I want my own happy ending…with him.

(disclaimer: photos are linked to their original sites 🙂